Thursday, December 28, 2006


My mum just said I dance like a xing xing. So I was thinking, xing xing as in stars?

Got my answer a while later,

"like ah meng"

Alright, here comes the wacko show on channel 8! Ma da is funny man. lol

Friday, December 22, 2006

walk walk

Garden Fest was ok. The flowers were nice and all, but when you have too many good things put together, they all look the same to me. And I saw Belinda Lee there with her relatives too! Oooh, she seemed so self-conscious, like she's expecting pple to look at her(which is true, cos I did heh).

Walked the whole of suntec, up and down, back and forth. Saw this star idol contestant, her name's lulu in this ch8 show currently showing.

Met a nice guy. He wanted to give us his movie tickets since he didnt want to wait for the movie or sth. Too bad I watched that particular flick once and the bday girl, twice. lol wasted. Anyway the cinema was fully booked by some grp, so we went down to marina sq to catch the curse of the golden flower.

Boy, you know what's half ball? That movie is nuts man! Especially the final battle. Wa lao, gong fu flicks should always be this gd. Wait.. I think that movie is psycho. Catch it for the gore, the balls, the unplanned for incest, whatever. I didnt know life in China could be this happening ages ago.

Well, the gift was ok I think =)

Friday, December 15, 2006

10 things I look for when buying a pair of shoes

1. It must be available for sale, not just only on display
2. I must feel comfortable in it
3. It can be worn by others before for fitting purposes, I don't mind
4. It has to fit right, not too tight, not too loose
5. It has to be within my budget
6. It need not be the coolest nor the prettiest pair
7. It has to be good to my feet
8. I must like it
9. I will grow to love it
10. It must be durable

There! A useless post.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

lousy days

i hate quarrelling.

no more.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

If you can relate to these

A beautiful mind.
Dirty little secret.

Then I'm thinking of you.

Monday, November 27, 2006

tactical advert campaigns

BMW starts it all. The first salvo.


Audi reacts.


The Japanese have something to say as well...


Finally the CEO of Bentley starts a campaign too


Saturday, November 25, 2006

loving you

Hahaha, just had the urge to take a photo of myself in ma new jacket.

Friday, November 24, 2006

my 21st time

Hoho, I got a green jacket, and a lovely card. Thanks guys, cos I simply adore this jacket.
Got a table with my fav number 23 too! Awww, sucha coincidence.

Thanks to all who wished me too =)

p.s. I actually bloody love the sms from you wai, I'm your superstar?! Haha gd one!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

studying in smu

here in the room, waiting for my sandwich from subway to be served right up to me. haha no wonder people stay the night in smu, it's still studying, but shenton way style!

Saturday, November 11, 2006

worn out

Been putting myself into quite a few shoes recently and it kills me when I cannot figure out why some feel the way they do. Have to stop trying to figure things out..

I need more people to tell me to study!

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Stressful hanging around sbs people

When all the chemistry and biology terms don't register, I feel so left out la.

But that's not what's stressing me out. How can you discuss exam topics throughout the journey home?? Sbs topics somemore.

"don't dye hair"

"can cause cancer"

Chem, bio terms starts popping out.

"maggie mee, got wax, carcinogenic..."

and then all the chem, bio terms again...

I realise I'm the only one not in exam mode yet. *shakes leg

Sunday, November 05, 2006


This lil one cracks me up! I feel happy just watching him do those belly laughs! =))

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Sometimes, you just wonder

how some people can be so childish. They make you feel sick.

Contradictory statements just don't work, dearie. If as you say, things are subjective, then kindly keep your judgement to yourself. You might have crossed the line too yea?

If there're things you really wish to say, then say it straight to me. How about finding that courage within yourself first?

Writing behind an alias really doesn't give you the credibility you already so sorely lack. Like I said, you're always welcome to listen to my account of this saga. Notice I'm using words in proportion to your argument already?

You overestimate yourself, that's for sure. Oops. Now I'm actually judging you!

I don't know where you got your information from, but just double check some of your 'facts' a lil yea. That's the least you could have done. Really.

And don't say I'm not apologetic please cos I don't owe you anything. I'm sorry yes, but not to you.

Monday, October 30, 2006

a lil dream

Ever had a dream where you're left clinging to the edge of the cliff with no one in sight? Now, you're getting tired, your arms are beginning to ache and the notion to just loosen your grasp comes to mind. And herein lies the dilemma, continue to suffer the aches and hold on tight, or to just give it all up and then hope you’ll go on to a better place.

Would you be better off holding on indefinitely till salvation finally comes along? What if it never comes? But what if it’s just around the corner?

Or, risk it some, and give in. After all, giving in ain’t that hard if you’ve been waiting for what seems like many ages. After all, life after death might just be possible. But what if it isn’t?

What do you do then?

In my dreams, I often just let go.

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Everything's A Ok

Alright, everything's fine now, am glad it's all resolved.

I'm tempted to post some pics now, but think I shouldn't. Anyway the movie surpassed expectations! I didn't fall asleep haha

Friday, October 27, 2006

My reply

Call me a pervert if you want. If basing your judgement on just a single side of the coin alone suits you just fine, then so be it. Do I need anymore friends than I already have? I doubt so. But I’m honestly disappointed with you.

This whole shit was taken out of context. Let me explain now, won’t you? Hear me out please.

Firstly, I’m truly sorry to the person whom I “victimized” in your own words. And that’d be the only person I’ll ever be sorry to. She means quite a bit to me if you didn’t know it already.

My apologies would never go to you, a bystander who chose to spread this piece of juicy news. You know, I was plenty hopeful that we could still be friends before today, but apparently, this is bullshit now for as far as I’m concerned. For whatever reason you chose to write in a public blog, do you seriously think it was a good idea? Does my insensitivity accord another bout of insensitivity from you?

I am not a pervert. Yes, my act might seem perverted if taken at face value, but had you so bothered to find out exactly what I had wanted to bring across to her, this might not be the case. It was my way of communicating the matter to her. I would never want to hurt her. And because of my insensitivity, I ended up making someone that I care much for, feel violated. For this, you won’t imagine how much I’m blaming myself.

Yet, to say that I’m perverted and dirty-minded is to actually give me a slap in the face. This is not a fact, at least not to me and to many of my friends. A real pervert however, would just smirk and enjoy all of these silently.

I did not do it to amuse myself. Neither did I do it because I was particularly proud of the fact that I had something interesting to say. Think it through, if I were really that eager to impress this upon others, I would have chosen a not so subtle phrase. Rather, I had chosen it in such a way that it would only be relevant to her and her alone. No one else would know unless either one of us spills it.

Besides, I do respect girls. Really. Where’s the disrespect to girls from my act? Fact is, it was my way of telling her something. True, it was insensitive and it made me out to be an ass but I can swear there was no disrespect intended. This turned out terribly wrong for me and her. But still it doesn’t give you the moral authority to use those hurtful words on me before even asking for an account of my side of the story.

It’s easy to take sides, I know.

But above all, utmost on my mind is for her forgiveness. Nothing else pretty much matters now.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006


I pretend,

to be nonchalant about it all.


for when a frown sets upon my face,

I guess it comes from thinking of you.

The indifference painstakingly built up,

would always crumble with the faintest smile.

It's hard in a way,

and yet there's no other way.

These 3 words.

They choke.

And I think you know it too.

Monday, October 23, 2006

my first time

This mv is schweeet!


Cherish what you have now for you never know when it'll be gone.

I'm beginning to look at myself in a different light. No, not cos some words were hurled at me. Rather, it's my mindset that's getting scary. Scary in the sense that while I wouldn't do some things maybe just 2 years back, I would do it now.

I'm becoming an adult all right.

That's when our childhood becomes increasingly vague. And yet remains so strangely poignant.

Friday, October 20, 2006

good day to die

Those 2 tests today were killers. They brought me back to earth and maybe even down to hell. To think I became complacent over some good results earlier on...

Then I couldn't reach you! No one forgets about their phone the way you do. Blurie!

Plan B then.

But today didn't turn out too bad for there'll always be you guys around me. Damn, Deathnote sucked la. But I kinda enjoyed just hanging out cos at least I know I wouldn't be alone at home. We should hang out more, do some damage to the brain cells, you know, just growing fatter, lazier and getting higher each time.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

"why doesn't my remote work?"

This is one sorry car. Her best friend would agree too.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

I used concealer??

Just because I did it in the past to cover up some huge pimple doesn't mean I'll always use it.

Lol, my mum advised me not to use the concealer in future today. Problem was, I didn't. Well, I finally managed to convince her that I had nothing on my face.

"so what facial cleanser do you use? why so smooth."

Haha, I'm gonna take it as a compliment man.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Crazy for a night

I showed joe my dance moves today over webcam.

There was the cluck cluck dance, the John Travolta grease thing, the Snake wriggle, the standing on chair pretending it's the bartop dance, the sexy squeeze boobs dance and finally the omg look shake. Hahaha was damn shagged by the time I was done.

I have no idea why I did it man. And that bloody idiot actually sat through my performance! I went through several songs ok.. Haha you're the best. Although you pinch my food, demand drinks, piss me off and disgust me so very often, you rule man, my bro. Don't think I didnt give a shit about your advice and such, cos I actually did. It's just that you give the right advice at the wrong time. There will be periods where you know something is so right yet there's no way you're gonna listen.

Had some crazy laughs in school today too during project work.

When you laugh, the world laughs with you.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

for you

I just hope you'll cheer up.

Friday, October 06, 2006

I forgot to s/u forensic sci

The deadline is 10pm today. And I fucking read the email at 11pm.


1 more subject to study hard for.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

no prawns for a whole month

sch sucks today.

Went to Quan's hm again to burn time while waiting for msformallydressed to be released from a seminar. Stepped on xiaofan, and I thought I was dead cos he looked like he was gonna cry. Fuck, I would la if I'm a 2 yr old kid being stepped onto by this big 65kg shithead. But then, my paternal instincts kicked in and I gave him the kindest ever look, plus I hugged him so nicely I bet he still feels the warmth in his sleep right now. Awww, he just looked at me with those teary eyes while I sayang-ed him, and he didn't cry! I think I'm getting nuts, I'm loving kids more and more. Not in that way, you sick bastards.

Then msformallydressed and I met and searched high and low for Activa xxx gel. Couldn't find it. Went thai for dinner and I had the freshest prawns ever, but it was just too many for 1 sitting.. so that explains the title.

Also found out that grandma was admitted into hospital again today. And guess what, I think it's cos of her eating habits. Why can't you just control yourself! See la, it's back to hospital food for you again. They never listen. Worried.

I learnt something about myself too today.

Monday, October 02, 2006

late again

I'm always late for comm fundamentals.

Didn't feel all tt great today. Or was it lack of sleep plus an empty stomach that made me grumpy, lethargic and shitty mooded today? I was like drifting in and out of class. Seriously, I need to find out if comm fundamentals is included in our gpa. I totally deserve an F for participation.

Tmr will be better though! That is after I get the IT test over and done with. Wed forensic sci test.. BAH! I'm in for a tough ride this week.

Luckily I have my dinner secured tmr =)
Is it better to love than be loved?


To be loved than love?

It's always tempting to wish for the latter, isn't it?

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Old times

2nd from left, that's me. I like to revisit the past. My bro(4th frm left) looked so punchable then.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

for the gamers


was a waste of money and time.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

moviemovie + thoughts

Let's hope friendswithmoney is gonna be good. Such shows never did appeal to me man. But then Rob-b-hood looked bloody stupid so we're like left only with this. Pray let it be good. Actually, the only thing going for it so far is that it's m18.

Ok. I just saw the trailer for friendswithmoney. I just hope that the seats are cosy enough... zzz

That reminds me, there was a time when I couldn't even watch nc16. The hell, missed halle berry's boobies while Vemalan was able to snook his way in. And now! m18 also no prob! R21, still have to wait. But then again, with the internet, R21 shows are way too mild. pffftt.

Spent last night trying to be um cheerful and all? But it was easy actually cos when you have someone crapping and giving u lameshit throughout, you just get so infected. Maybe, that's why man, dunno.

But yea, it was clear and I already understood it like a few days back, so yest was just affirming in a way. Which sorta reminds me of biz law project. Which again reminds me of acct and IT projects too.

But I'm not yielding.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

I thought it was gonna hurt

But nah, it didn't.

Ok it just reminds me, I feel gay now.

We swim and tan, have breakfast, lunch, dinner and supper together. Plus movies, shopping and soccer betting. But I didn't feel gayness then.

Today is a bloody gay-day though. 2 guys going for piercing, with the same exact earstuds, cos there were like zero choices left.

I feel... dirrrtty.

On another note, what does single but unavailable really mean?

Friday, September 22, 2006


Great. So what's wrong with me being deep in thought. Stop looking at me as though I'm behaving weird. Cos I was not!

I didn't realise last night just how some things can change the mood for supper so drastically. And no, wai, I'm not in depression. Just cos you saw me doing tt shit a few months back, doesn't mean I'm always like that when I go silent. Plus, I wasn't mumbling dude, was just tired. Wanted booze, but they didn't sell beer. Incredulous. Yea, beer could always be bought elsewhere, but the mood was gone, no one seemed to want to drink anyway.

I was so tired, I didn't even comment on probably the ugliest pair of pink shoes I've ever seen. It looked so.. eighties. Was it really yours?? Hahah it's funny actually, damn, now I think those slippers I bought were just too good for you.

Only sim seemed to at least uds why I wasn't noisy last night.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Some people are just so difficult to fathom.

They're brrr-ing cold in their msges, and then the next moment in real life, they turn out to be so much 'nicer'. I find it very fake la..

Especially when they have new friends beside them. Like wth are you trying to proof. That you're always so chummy with people around you? Pretentious shit.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Updates updates

Was walking out of ab113 sem,

"are you two together?"

"huh? why'd you say that?"

"cos both of you look very ai mei together"

I think I smiled...

P.s. Does this count as an update? hur, Your turn!

Friday, September 15, 2006

I think I'm screwed.

You just remind me of everything.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006


Grandma's condition is better now. Though she still has pneumonia, basically everything's fine. Doc said to expect her to be discharged by next week. That's great news, but in the near future, she still has to have her gall bladder removed. But we'll leave that aside for now. Nice, I'm glad she made it through with all those complications.

Caught Barnyard today with aaron, chris and 2 kids in tow. I guess they found it pretty funny. Drove mer's car too. Got lost, but glad we found our way in the end. Then got lost again..

Sunday, September 10, 2006

The ride home

It was past midnight and there were not many cars left out there on the roads, so I thought she could handle it. After all, someone's been bragging about how daddy was so proud of her. Haha.

That first bump over the kerb, it sure wasn't nice. But yea, there was that bus blocking ur way, so maybe I can understand.

That part where you didn't notice the red arrow at the traffic junction, and thought that the green light would allow you to turn right. Well, we were all lucky there. Still want your andersen's? Make it less 1. Damn. By now, we're like all super awake.

When we thought that all was fine, you made us jump once again when you actually wanted to use the incoming lane to turn into a roundabout. What were you thinking... Sleepy!

But, we don't blame you. Just practise more!

Thursday, September 07, 2006

I hope granma will be fine. I WANT her to be fine.

I don't pray usually, but I'm gonna start now. Pray, granma that you'll be fine...

How the hell am I gonna go on with my Fm. No fucking mood.

Monday, September 04, 2006

Late for class!!

Added link to Mer's blog. Ok your turn to update!

Was super late today for class. But damn, that tutor was cute. I like plump frens. Hahhaa so cute man. Reminds me of j**. That fat ass.. enjoying himself in nus. Having an illicit relationship with his cousin. He was like telling me how happy he was to be with his cousin. WTF. His COUSIN! And the age gap.. omfg. You are one crazy sick asshole. Luckily you share your stuff with me. I'm so glad I have happening stories to tell all my newfound friends in ntu. =)

I hate it when you're unsure about so many things. It's like backseat driving. You're just being led along. The wheel is just so not in my hand. Or so I choose to believe. Projects, tutorials, quizzes.. Bah!!
I'll take charge soon enough though.. gotta start cracking my butt off or face those Cs..

On the way hm, was talking to XiQian about the girls in our tut grp today. Who's prettier, who's happening, who's hotter. Then there were the rankings. Superficial? Yup. We all are. Then I came up with a theory.

Guys are more superficial then girls.

Gal is ugly. Guy likes gal's character, but will never consider her.

Guy is ugly. Gal likes his character, and slowly falls in love with him.

Ask around. Get a guy to admit that his gf is ugly, and you get a treat from me. Now, girls are apparently better cos they'll go "oh, he's not my type, but he just won me over with his sincerity" *silly grin.

Awww.. but there're always exceptions la.

Sunday, August 27, 2006

Friday, August 25, 2006

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Bon Voyage Charmaine!

You might be at the airport surfing the net... who knows

Take care over there in the States.

And I wanna hear about how they're gonna change your accent after 4 months. hahaha


Growing up is a pain in the ass. Give me back my happy meals, transformers, wang wang nu nai, my power rangers and easy to score exams. I want my childhood to last. And all those ard me too. I don't want change.

Hearing grandma say she's gonna pass me her goldchain is heart breaking, wrenching and saddening all at the same time.

It's like hearing last words. Seeing her in such a fragile state, having trouble opening even doors, I've realised that I never did treasure her in the past. Even up till now, I have no idea how to endear myself to her. All I can do is look at her out of the corner of my eyes and hope she's feeling fine. But those words she spoke to my mum scared the shit out of me and made me worry and think. All this while, I just kept quiet.

"I'm scared. I can't even open doors easily. When I told the doctor, he was concerned about it too"

"I'm giving zhi hao(me) a gold chain. He's my eldest grandson. I got it years back and it was expensive", and she smiled.

All this while, I just kept silent. I didn't know what to say.

I know she's preparing for something. And I know what she's preparing for. But it's really sad how I can't seem to communicate with her. I can't even speak her dialect well.

And all I can do is,

"Ma, come to my room, lie on my bed and sleep, take care..."

I knew I should have stayed for dinner with her and the rest of the family. But I had a birthday party. And I truly wanted to have fun that day too. But, I'm sure that, from this moment, for every gathering, I'll try my best to go. Days might pass quickly for me, and missing 1 gathering might not be a big deal. But for grandma, I think I finally understand, every gathering is 1 more day of bliss with her children and grandchildren. I wouldn't want her to feel lonely. Not anymore. Since I now understand her fears, her wishes and her love for us.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

My super ex-girlfriend

Nice show. Almost every single scene will alude to sex. The scene where they banged till the bed collapsed was really funny. Crazy fun.

Scene - When the bed collapsed
Super gf: Oh dear! I'm sorry about it! Don't worry, I promise I'll replace it for you...
Lead: My penis or the bed?

Hahaha dudes, you'll like it. Not sure whether babes out there will take to it though.

I'm happy today too. I might be wrong about it or I might just be right, but no matter, it just feels gd knowing my gift didn't go unappreciated.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Bandits made good

Once upon a time, in a world long before our time, there existed 2 different groups of bandits. The first group were the roving bandits. They would move from city to city, pillaging every single item from each village. They left no stones unturned, and kept moving on to terrorise different villages.

Then there were the stationary bandits. They would stay in a particular village, and would rob its villagers periodically with the aim of long term benefits unlike the roving bandits who had a short term view of things and would clear the whole village out instead.

As time passed, the stationary bandits became more organised and efficient. They resided in villages, with the aproval of the villagers themselves. How? They promised to protect the villagers from the roving bandits. The only downside was that the villagers had to pay tributes to the stationary bandits yearly.

One day, one of the senior member of the stationary bandits had an idea. Let's give ourselves another name instead of 'Bandits'. Let's call ourselves The Government. Let's also change the term of paying Tributes to paying Taxes.

It sounds really nice now, doesn't it?


School is getting better everyday. Things are becoming clearer. I'm getting lost only once on avg everyday. The lecturers are clear, coherent and thankfully Singaporean. I'm comfortable with the people around me. The timetable is really nice. School is not bad at all.

Friday, August 11, 2006

Azar Azar Fighting!!

Joe, you arsehole. I will prove you wrong. I'll stuff all my grade As up your ass at the end of this sem. =)

I have a feeling you're gonna be so bloated from your behind.

Hehs. Thanks brudder for giving me the motivation I needed.

Ok! Study hard!! Fighting!! I really do love 'Full House' btw.

Okies, time to bury my head in AA101 Accounting 1. AB102 Financial Management. AB107 Business Law. Exciting.

At least a reply, no?

I'm all flustered wondering if she had even read my mail.

Who am I to you actually?

Just this question.

I really want to know.

Monday, August 07, 2006

First day of Sch

Had my first day of sch today. No lessons. Just some games and stuff to maybe get to know my tutorial group better.

Nothing much to say about it.

Uni could be better.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Old friends

Went to Charmaine's Farewell cum Birthday party. Hahaz, it was like a super duper advanced birthday party seeing that she came into this world only 1 day before me. And my birthday is in NOV. Hahaha, but whatever it takes to make her happy la! So.. Charmaine reads my blog. Very honoured.

The "birthday" girl looked so much better with contacts, hahahz and she seems a tad more feminine yesterday. Must be the hair and dress. Met up with some old classmates too. Peiwen is so pretty now! But oh wells, she's too tall.

It's been 3 years since we last met as a class. Wouldn't say that I really missed them all, but the feeling was good seeing that we spent 2 years as jc mates, fooling around in sch, having pillow fights in the student's lounge blah blah..

More of such gatherings please.

p.s. Charmaine, have a safe trip to the states and I'm pretty sure you'll make many new friends over there who will celebrate your 21st birthday with ya!

Thursday, August 03, 2006

I'm ashamed of myself man. Bloody just can't seem to speak in chinese well. Today we presented our policies to this group of chinese speaking Malaysians working in Spore. My job really was to assist them in filling up the forms and to address some of their questions.

I just snooked my way through, pausing at least once every min to think through what I'm gonna say next as my brain furiously tries to recall all those chinese words I've learnt.

Scenario 1. Last week. A Chinese Lady.

Speaking in Chinese : "Can you explain this to me?"

FARK. What's the chinese word for "policy"?? In the end, I used JI4 HUA4. SIBEI MALU LA! Dunno why the hell I used this word. Ji4 Hua4 means 'Plan' if I'm not wrong.

Scenario 2. Today. A M'sian Chinese male.

Speaking in Chinese too: "Can you explain and READ out this questionaire for me?"

HONG GAN liao. Want me to explain, I can still bluff my way through. You want me read! My standard at reading chinese words is worse than those sec sch kids la. So I nervously told him to hold on a min, I'll get my colleague to read out for him. Hehs, that guy was f**king blur-ed out with my chinese before that anyway.

Scenario 3. Today. Chinese male too. Helping him fill up his form.

Reading out for him the wordings in the form was sheer torture. I stuttered my way thru, then I did a quick recap of what I've said, and I realised I didn't even uds half of what I've said to him. No wonder he looked lost. lol got so nervous I explained something wrongly to him. Then a full timer took over from me in helping him fill up his form. Guess what, when the full timer corrected my mistake, that guy just blanked. This shows he didn't even farking understand me in the first place la!

Hais I want to be able to speak Chinese confidently. It's not only impt, it's vital too for my career.

Saturday, July 29, 2006

feeling sick

Woke up today with an itching throat and a headache. Turned feverish later in the day.

Still awaiting the birth of my sea monkeys. But I don't think it will happen anytime soon. =(

Why doesn't panadol clear my headache. Feeling heavy and groggy. PLUS had to deal with this shop that sold my brother some expensive(3 figure sum) fish equipment that did not live up to expectations. Bloody angry, plus f**king sick now.

The item was bought 2 days ago. Then we discovered it couldn't perform well, and so we brought it back to the shop today. They didn't want to change it for us, and instead asked us to go see the supplier. So I was f**king pissed. Aren't they supposed to change it for us since it's less than 3 days old. Nvm. I called up the supplier, and he said he would liasion with the shop on this coming Monday. Come Monday, if they still don't bloody do anything about it, I will then turn nasty. You buggers, trying to push the responsibility around. I swear I'll get back a gd working set from them.

urgh... sick

Tuesday, July 25, 2006


actually up till now, i still dunno what's your reason for breaking up.

but i will always remember you as the sweet girl i met on the first day of my first job.

i can say things but not mean it. but i mean what i say here.

this relationship shaped the way i feel about how a rs should be for me now. i'm grateful we were once together. i'm also grateful we parted ways.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

I'm thinking of a person right now.

She's enchantingly ravishing and possesses highly interesting nonchalant elegance.

I'm hopeless. hahahh.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Sunday, July 16, 2006


potluck yest was nice in many ways. met up with almost all the pioneers from my batch. then just chatted till i think 10pm.. imagine the noise man... 15, including our very own staff tan, guys talking all at the same time.

will not forget them lol

Friday, July 14, 2006

potato salad

Had to prepare something for tml's potluck at shawn's place. So....

Looks good not? Haha act i don't think so but it definitely tastes great! I made it! But with help from someone too la. Haha and today was like a lesson in home economics.

We were at cold storage, "auntie, which potato can be cubed, which one is the mash type ah?" Our lesson began that very moment. Or at least for me la. I learnt that potatoes from USA are those softer type and potatoes from australia can be a little harder.

"potatoes with less eyes are less poisonous" lol ok la, I choose to believe her...

Then we went ard looking for mayo and bacon bits and eggs.

After that it was home to boil and then mix the potatoes with eggs, bacon bits and mayo. It was fun cos at least I had someone to do it tgt with me. Haha AND she really helped me alot cos I didn't know even simple stuff like when the eggs and potatoes would be fully cooked...

Thks alot sera!

Monday, July 10, 2006

what after the world cup?

hoping to go swim with wai on tues

gonna go catch pirates with char next wed

then going for insurance training next thurs

coming sat, potluck at shawn's place


could it be...

the world cup is over

lol I'm feeling dejected and lost without it.

I really need to have something to do everyday. If not I'll most probably end up suffering from depression and go hiding in the toilet once every 13.52min to cry out loud. For the dim-witted, I'm just trying to be funny. Don't think this is funny? Yea, you're dim.

Point is, I'm sitting at home now, typing away cos I can't get to sleep. Why? That wc final. Italy won. Yes. But more importantly, someone tried to hit onto sim?? LOL erm, IMHO, I think she was looking to earn some quick bucks. LOOKED pretty much lk a Stu*y MaM* to me. I mean wth was that lady in her middle age doing thr at safra on the wc final screening night?? She didn't look THAT interested in the match. Hohoho, maybe she didn't hit onto me cos she thought I was underaged... hmmm...

Yesterday's concert at ulu pandan cc was ok. Those girls were brave. Imagine trying to organise your very own concert. Nice work thr.

Are girls from choir artistic? LOL ask me. I've HAD FIRST HAND EXPERIENCE. Twice.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

when you're in love, you think the world of her.

so you put in both time and effort,

thinking you'll get closer to her this way.

nothing fazes you, cos you think it's all worth it.

one day, just one day, you're gonna touch her.

not CARESS! but touch her heart!

the first date. you think it's super!

but wait.

was it a date?

she didn't think so.

Different Expectations.

then heartbreak comes a knocking once again.

-For all you guys out thr. Don't be a loser! Recognise the situation!

Friday, June 30, 2006


Can't stand it. Just like what I told sim. The cfm look. Kaoz. Now I know better.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

What if girls were to serve our nation?

Haha, make sure you watch till the end. I can really identify with them. LOL! A reversal of roles. What if girls had to do chin ups in camp while guys are the ones still studying? What if they sprouted foul words while all the guys are still like nuns outside?

Haha so girls! You got the better deal. Don't argue.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

Added link to xiAnie


I won $150 so far from the world cup. nice? The thing is, the more I win, the less I'm willing to take bigger risks. I have this feeling that I'll lose big soon. So, I just don't bet when I'm not confident. haha it's quite common sense.

Went and bought davidoff's coolwater today, it smells so manly. hahaha. I'm growing up nicely.

Uni is starting soon, and I guess I can't shake legs anymore come august. So who wants to shake legs together with me now?? Haha, we'll be so happy shaking legs together. Shaking our legs all day looong...

Sigh, xianie placed the link to my blog at such a LOW position. lol.

Also, remember the cookies I tried to bake? Well, they turned out very nicely done with the exception of the first batch. Uncle Gary's Famous cookies will be famous throughout the world! The name already says it all. Quality cookies with a quality name. It can never go wrong!

My very first cookies. Chao ta ones. *I hear some sniggers*
Of cos la, the 2nd batch was much nicer...

Ok, time for soccer. =))

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Karin's birthday surprise

Karin thought it was just gonna be me and her celebrating, but in the end all of them came when she was looking at the menu. Holding a lighted bday cake, we sang her a bday song in the restaurant. Haha, what a surprise man..

Hahaz! I knew I did a lousy job trying to keep it a secret.. but at least I hope you were touched. I think you were touched la... anyway here're some of my classmates from nyjc 1st 3 mths. The girls are quite pretty now hor? heh

And, Karin's the one on the rightmost.

Me? You better recognise me dudes!

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Baking my cookies

Ok! *rub hands* I must get down to baking my cookies.. hahah

Been delaying it since yesterday. The thought of cleaning up after everything is always so tiring. That's why I'm still not doing it.. but don't really have much time left, so I'll just have to get started.

Also, I just visited the blog that me and my ex created for ourselves. This is bloody top secret stuff I'm talking about. Haha cos only the 2 of us know about it. But had no heart to read on, it's all in the past le.. but to me, once I really really like someone, then there'll always be a place for that someone in my heart even yrs after.

I'm talking about this cos of a show I watched yest, shall write about it AFTER I bake those cookies.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

later am going out to get some ingredients and hopefully i'll find a ready set kinda box where they provide u with both ingredients and also instructions. i'm gonna bake some cookies or maybe brownies. My first time ever.

also, just wanna thk sera for accompanying me to town to get some stuff. i would be totally lost if there were no one beside me man. luckily, i had this gal who knew quite alot about such things with me on tt day! i hope she's feeling better today.

thk to bizhu too, for going with me to sentosa. hahaha although yea i think it was more fun to be performing then just being on-lookers.

oh ya, and i'm out of a job now. i quit my previous job after 2 days. it felt lk doing push ups for the whole damn day! bloody hard labour la. couldn't stand it, so i quit. but i left the company on amicable terms.

am trying to organise sth special now. heh heh so hopefully everything will go smoothly and let that day turn out to be a fun one for us all.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

first day at work

it sucks.. doesn't need grey matter. just manual labour. pasting labels, moving stores. for this, i get $50 a day. for a 5half day week, it'll add up to $1.2k. it's because of this money that keeps me going.

makes me feel under-used. but oh well, i do like the smell of cash =)

anyway I'm gg to sentosa this sunday. who else is going?? Balloon Hat Fest.

oh ya, if sim is reading this, then i will say that i'm enlightened le. think and think and think, bloody hell, i think i finally got it. hahaz, imagine i'm a boat, trying to sail against the current to this beach, then i think i'm closer to shore! but no! the current pushes me back again. useless, hopeless, fruitless, i rather go out to sea again la. =))

Monday, May 29, 2006

Today is my ord.




I'm out of the army at long last. Freedom to dig my nose. To stand on 1 feet. To lean against the wall. To shout at will. Basically, I'm back to where I was 2 yrs plus ago. But then this time I feel a little bit slow with stuff related to studies. Girls my age are already in their 2nd yr of uni.. god, and I only have an Alevel cert. Makes me feel slow. But my consolation comes from those juniors who are still stuck in that place I called 'home' for the past 2 yrs. Hahaz just wait a little bit more. Just put up with a little bit more of shit. Your day will come, just as my day has come. I expect congratulations to fall in quickly. Fall IN! Lol. I'm gonna cont using some army terms.

" Mum! Dont worry la, I'll sleep by 2359 "

" WHAT? U cant expect me to book in by 0200 "

Hahaz oh yea and also without the army taking up my time, I can go find a nice, cute and sweet gf! Hahaha It sucks to have a relationship while you're serving ns. I just booked out frm changi, went home to yishun for a quick change of clothes, and I'm off to city hall again. And she expects me to walk all the way to suntec. Just to walk back again to city hall. I'm dead tired ok! That's why I guess I lacked what she termed as concern. =) What is concern to her sia? I go all the way to city hall at 10pm just to send her home. Isn't this concern? Lol, I just have to let it out...

Romance aside, I'll have more time for friends too. I want Sakae again! Who's interested? I kept thinking of sushi today. From morning until now. Lol don't I sound like a pregnant woman with all her cravings!! You just have to eat, my people. Eating is gd! If you say it's not gd, then you dont eat lor. See? Case proven. Hehz.

I can't believe my mood now. It's like I'm on ecstasy, thou I've nv tried one. hahahz

Sunday, May 28, 2006


Tomorrow, I'm booking in.. wait.. wrong choice of words. Tml, I'm visiting my camp again. Hahaz to get my pink IC. Oh my dear pink IC, I've missed you so badly. No more an nsf after tml. I'll be back to being a civilian.

Time really passes by so quickly. I'm gonna miss all my idiotic and crazy ass friends in the army. Especially this guy named joe. What he did in Penang was so cool (want me to elaborate?), and another time he almost cried cos of a prank, and and and.... so much more. Kaoz, he's almost like a clown man. Hahaahah.

Friday, May 19, 2006

Trip to the Zoo!

Went out with sera today to the zoo. And we took many pics, but those animals, hahaha they make me feel like squeezing them! Lol, below are some nice pics of their BUTTS! Enjoy!

Sera here, taking pictures of footprints on the ground. Very cute... haha


Let me call it my lucky eight. Lol, pretty not?


Look HerE, Urgh!! Couldn't get its front shot, so i decided to just capture its butt for the sake of taking a pic.


Ass Parade dudes... see the neatness? Those lines.. sexy... LOL!


HAHAHA now this one's my fav! LOOK at the butt.. Swollen, red and ugly but it's like so mouth poppingly attractive.


"don't mind me! *shy*"

Hahaha. Nice not those butts? They were really cute la.. just that i sorta pity them. For they can never go to orchard rd to shop. And they are always naked. ;) Saw this poor mule and a hinny shivering. Really quite a sad sight.

And there were really many kids visiting the zoo too! Alot of pri sch excursion during this period i guess. So cute, i wish i could go up to them and squeeze some of their cheeks..

Overall quite an interesting day =)

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Mi3 anyone? Not today thou.. have to visit grandma in hospital.

Time just seems to float by when you have nothing to do. lol, I'm quickly losing track of the days in a week. After all, everyday is pretty much the same.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Pictures from Brunei

Finally I got those pics..

Gonna show some to you guys =)
Btw, those jungle pics look like shet, so i'm not posting them.
Hahahah, gotta keep up the image!

Beside our lovely bunks. Much better than in Spore. Seriously.


Us, with the canteen ladies. They're always using their phones too! Lol. And they're ssshy.


The prata man! I had prata almost everyday while I was thr. Grown so sick of it, I didn't have prata for like 4 months after that.

Sigh. Time passes by so quickly. I wish I were still in the army... yes, I'm being sarcastic over here. ;)))

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Playboy in shirt

Dude thk for this cool shirt.. lol I will try my very best to fulfill your best wishes for me. A playboy in a shirt! Wow, you certainly have high expectations of me. Thk again man.. today was great fun until at night (you know what la). But then again, it's just the 3 of us.. and it was really gd to hav you guys around me during these trying times LOL. And what?? I know how to walk home safely ok, don't think i'm like some arse who will drink himself to death.. no fear! And pls dude, ur pool sucks man.. unlike me, anyhow play also can put those balls into the pockets. hahaha or isit when i'm truly serious about things, they never go my way?? Bloodyass thing called L.I.F.E

You know how isit when you are sad but then you still smile and laugh? Ya, that's me for you. Today was one of those days. But I will get over it soon enough. Nothing too much for me to handle, of cos, with the help of some magic beverages. And boy, I could have taken more if not for the sorry fact that I have camp on the next day.

Anyway I feel stupid now. WH, you must be thinking wad a sorry ass I was right? Talking and talking about other things but then you know how I felt la. Sim too..

Karin where are you?

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Feeling really bad.. Karin! I hope you'll see this in china. Really sorry I forgot to at least wish you a bon voyage. It slipped my peasized mind. Tell me ALL about your trip thr when you come back.

Waa, feels lk shit now for forgetting man...

Saturday, April 22, 2006


I'm happy! haha, ORD is nearing and... I'm just happy la! lol

Sunday, April 09, 2006


I can't stand liars. But then everyone is a liar in 1 way or another. Those closest to me, they lie..

I pretend to be deaf, I try not to hear what I hear, I ignore the obvious signs. I run away from it. I'm too afraid to talk about it, and to face it.

I just hope everything will stay the same. Really... just don't ask..

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Shit, I still need to harden my resolve. Why can't I do it?? Argh!

Mani was right.. Gonna heed his words of wisdom! Lmao

Sunday, April 02, 2006

haha, my life is getting interesting. Bought 3 planes! Can u imagine.. can't help it, i just can't resist a gd bargain. And i'm still waiting for gd weather to fly the bigger one. I think it's gonna be a blast.

Something funny happened to me on april's fools day, nonono, I was't fooled by anyone, but I think I made someone happy on her bday? hahah ok it felt gd to hear her words.. feeling a lil big headed now *Puffs up chest. Lols.

Anyway I didn't manage to trick anyone on April's fools day. Next yr... just wait till next yr! Hah!

2 more weeks to clearing my leave!

2 more weeks to freedom!

Friday, March 31, 2006

I need to harden my resolve.

Friday, March 24, 2006

Some people just think they hav it all

Bloody pissed when i read e blog of someone i know. Wth is his prob? Does he really think he's all that great and being OH SO NOBLE by sacrificing his time for the band? He chose this path, he wants to go all the way, fine, i respect him for that. But, if u choose to do sth, pls do it without thinking about receiving due recognition for its success or even for ur effort.

I don't doubt his efforts, but when it comes to a band, nothing is a one man show. You think you are working alone and doing a one man show? Please, open ur fking eyes, the rest are what? Not doing anything? They are putting in their time, making an effort to come, and then just trying to do sth for the band. Look at it from another point of view, why be someone who chooses to think that the glass is half empty? Why not let it be be half full? People lead their own lives. You have no right to impose ur ideals and visions on others. You are idealistic, tt's gd. Yet you're also blind to the many things that could happen to other individuals. Band might be very high up on ur list of priorities, but to another person, there could be more pressing worries lk studies, projects and even duties in my case.

Understand that we all lead different lives. This could make u happier. Also, realise that you are no longer THE person in charge. They do not come under ur charge anymore. And, oh why bother? Since u're making so much noise over how u feel about the present and the future, since u think the future is bleak, y bother wasting ur efforts?

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Teachers, they inspire me

My gp tutor is so helpful! Had a few questions for her and she took out her own time to answer them. Really appreciate it, Ms Tan!

Recently, i've been thinking..

I have a few more career paths that i might wanna pursue, namely, being a prisons officer ( cos it's not dangerous and i'll be lk a mentor ) , a teacher ( lk to get paid to scold others.. joking! seriously i actually lk to teach ) and an accountant.

Which should i go for? I have no idea, but by the end of uni, i hope to figure and also to discover whr my interests lie.

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Band concert was a success!

Haha yes and it was worth it. All the leave and off i took, all the stupid extra duties that i had to bear and those "SLACKER" accusations that made me so wanna strangle them. It was worth it man. I liked the way we had fun during the performance. And my juniors, wow, never seen cuter people then them. They really reminded me of myself in the past. And you bet this feeling resonates through the entire alumni. We were all talking about how this and that used to be such, how much things has changed, how some things will always remain the same, blah blah...

I loved it when my juniors called out my name during the performance! haha love them to bits. I just like such things la. It was really cool to hear my name frm up the stage. And those in the alumni seemed shocked tt my name was called. Y cannot? I popular mah! hahaha just didn't expect it at all!

Though the performance wasn't a flawless one, it came through nicely because there was a kinda vibe. Dunno how to describe it, but i think everyone really wanted to do their best. No half hearted effort type of people this time.

I made new frens too, mostly those frm younger batches, but most probably we'll just lose contact.. yet it's been gd this past few weeks. They're all nice pple! Cept for 1 tt I dont care for much. Bah, wont even think of him!

P.s. Thks zz for ur trumpet. It was nicely maintained. =)

4 weeks to clear leave. Yea! And kiss gd bye to duties, camp food and lousy pt.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Saturday, March 04, 2006

It's a choice?

What's in a choice? You choose from only those that you can chose from. Is this really a choice? Wouldn't it be better to choose sth that you really like but can't achieve presently? This would make a better choice doesn't it?

But I don't. And I know many who don't. There are risks involved. And the heartache that comes will not being able to achieve sth u set off for is not what people like me can bear to go through. Why choose this girl when you really like another girl? Why choose this route when all you dream about is to go the other way? You know why? It's our brain telling us "look, the heart might be right, but trust me, it won't go wrong if you follow me, afterall, I've the smarts"

And so, like obedient soldiers, the brain leads us for most of the time. But the happiest times came when both my brain and heart concur, thus making my choice relatively painless. Yet, this cannot always be the case.

So, do we dare to dream. Or do we just go for that peaceful, already outlined for us kind of life.

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Real Madrid lost...

And I lost 10 bucks to simo. Was half asleep when the 2nd half started, then bang! Goal! Oops, not my team.. too sleepy to even watch on, argh!

And I just realised something, feb is coming to an end! hahaz

Cos janice's bday party is on the 25th, and it's this sat.. dunno whether I wanna go thr now.. cos of joe la.. pang seh kia..

And with the end of feb, comes march, and then april. April=Clear leave period! WhooHoo! Just thinking about this makes my heart feel so nice, warm and kinda fuzzy. Haha, it's almost as good as talking to someone sweet out thr..

Don't have much to write about these days, cos i'm lk always at home. Will someone pls ask me out? ok?? hahaz

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Just slacking at home, sitting in front of this computer with food in my hand and ice cream in my mouth. The ice cream's good, hazelnut flavour.. haha and it's bite-sized so 1 mouth and it's gone.

It's boring to stay at home, but what to do? It's a Sunday and I've got to book into camp tonight, and it can really be a spoiler. Spoils my mood for going out. Imagine "Hey guys, sry but I've got to go hm early today, got to bk in". Blah! It sucks! No mood...

Will also try to go for the next band pract. Gone so long without touching the trumpet, I must really sound lk sheet now, nvm thou, I'll just give it a try. At least it will be Edo conducting so I think it'll be more informal and less stressful.

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Happy CNY.. Whr are my angbaos??

The time has come once again for those adults to fill up my pockets with wads of freshly minted erh notes.

Happy Chinese New Yr Dudes and (of cos) Babes!

P.s. I simply love the smell of cny. The crisp smell of notes, the bak kua, the sweets, tibits, and my fav cashew nuts!

Friday, January 20, 2006

nearly buang!

Today, I almost knocked down this motorcyclist. Bloody hell, he just stopped his bike all of a sudden, had to swerve into the next lane in order not to bang into him. Brakes were useless cos it was really too close. I hate driving beside a motocycle man. Lucky I was alert.. and not feeling sleepy, if not, that's it for me. Off to db I go. Fuk that guy, use the hazard lights la, idiot!

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

thinking and thinking...

What's a spare tire for? It's there for our assurance. We have the tires already, but it's just there in case anything were to happen to the car.

Similarly, in our lives, we have many spare tires. Take me for eg, I applied for 2 places to the 2 unis, and for what? It's for me to feel gd that I can still choose frm the 2 unis. But is this gd? I never did think so, but being practical and everything, I just did it. Simply put, I liked the feeling of having both places.

Some, they choose to apply this principle into their love lives. They might already have someone in their heart, but concurrently, they're still giving another party the false hope that something might just happen. Maybe, it's just us humans. We all like to have back-up plans. When something doesn't go according to plan, we still want to feel gd about ourselves, and so, we get a spare tire. Now, I'm not just talking about myself ok! But it's just that many times over, I've been observing this kinda of stuff happen to friends ard me.

And so, I'm still thinking.. trying to analyse it, but perhaps in a more positive light. Cheers.

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Anderson open hse

Went to my sec sch yest. Was really filled with nostalgia man. Especially when I saw myself in the photo albums. Wa lao, I looked lk shit, very toots, but also very innocent.

No worries about the future. Just having fun.. hahah oh man, I mean I can't believe I really was that toot lor. Hahahah, I want those days to flood and overwhelm me, to bring me back to days where hours flow by quickly and everything went smoothly (cept for chasing girls la).

Hmmm, I gotta apologise thou for being late by quite some time (act i was bloody late). But really, thanks for asking me to go.. I think I needed this man. To feel young again. hahaha, ya feel young. Cos they really are a bunch of spirited pple. So funny man, those girls and guys dancing.. heh I can't join in. I'm just too shy.

Then after the open hse, it was shopping. Didn't manage to find the shoe I want. Really unlucky man. But it was fun la, went ard just looking at pple. Went to the middle of the fountain of wealth and touched the water. Stomach almost bursting from dinner. Yea, today is a nice day. I lk going back to my old schs and meeting up with frens.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

someone out there?

sometimes, all i ever want is just for someone to be there for me. not my parents. but just someone.
someone i can share my experiences with, someone i can bear my heart out to. many times a day, i might have the urge to talk to someone, but the someone is non-existant. and this makes me feel so empty.

but so what if i have this someone?

life would be easier if i could treat everyone as though they're my someone. but then again, the someone is only special because she's my someone.
until i get to realise the meaning of having a someone, until then, i'll make myself believe that there's no-one.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

I lose either way

Ever felt the way this guy felt? I did. Haha but wth just say it out. At least you did something.. doing something is always better than nothing. I don't like to sit around waiting for things to happen. But cos of this, I can get pretty impatient with some people.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

New heli! License! ORD!

Got a new heli, so fun cos I can fly it around in my home! haha

I think of ord day and night. Come march, it'll be time for me to clear my leave + off. Woot! Very soon, very soon... Oh, plus my driving license will arrive by feb this yr! heh heh..

Come to think of it, my life ain't that bad ya? =))

Sunday, January 01, 2006

New Year's Eve at East coast chalet

It was crazy. The company had booked like 5 chalets all in a row. I think hundreds turned out for this party. At first, it seemed pretty boring, the usual bbq stuff.. It was fun only when they started to play around with those foam sprays at night. Haha, and I joined in too. All sprayed foam like there was no tml! Some poor fool got targeted and god, his whole face disappeared in foam!

Then they moved on to water bombs where it really looked like a grenade range, with all the bombs flying around. Very interesting.. Cos there was this time when I was standing just outside the chalet with some other people, and then we got targeted. The bombs came in fast and furious, hahah and those giggly girls, they all pushed into me against the wall as they tried to avoid the bombs. I was like helpless man. 3 girls just pushed into me until I was practically hugging all 3(for like 30secs)?! hahaha an experience not to be missed thou..

Then came all the company talks and blah blah. Soon, it came to countdown proper. The moment we ushered in 2006, it was like Sentosa you know, all the foam! I had 2 cans of foam in my hand, and I made sure i made gd use of it! hahah So fun actually, it's like you spray me, and I make sure you get sprayed too! And also, it was back to water bombing! It was so crazy. You have to be there to feel it. The open field got waterlogged just from the shear amount of water used! Things became uglier when some started to put mud into the bombs. Shit man, normally pretty and 'ai swee' girls got their face dirtied with mud when they got struck. As for me, my white pants became brown polka dotted shit. So wet, so wild! hahah ok and I will thank joe for treating me to the party. Thks!